Hope Spirit

Better Days Staying Optimistic Despite Challenges

Sometimes, when things in your life seem to be going along just fine, you get thrown a curve ball, or two...or three. It happens. How you react is what matters. Recognizing that most situations are temporary goes a long way to staying hopeful even when things seem bleak.

It was one of those days. At least what I used to think of as those days. As soon as I opened my eyes I knew I was out of balance, off-kilter, whatever you want to call it. I used to think it meant I had to endure a whole day of things working against me. The car would have a flat, I’d spill coffee or juice on my clothes, I’d forget something important at home, like my PHONE. (Lord help me if I leave my phone somewhere.) I’d be headed full-speed toward an awful day, knowing nothing would go right. With each mini disaster, my mood would darken and I’d be ready to fight somebody by mid-morning.

I’m not sure exactly when I discovered that one small mishap didn’t have ruin my entire day, week or even the rest of the year. If I was inconvenienced, it was possible to address it and continue. I’m not a slap-a-smile-on-my-face-like-everything-is-perfect kind of person nor am I going to complain for an hour (not normally) but I learned to think differently. I learned to let things go as best I can because control is an illusion. Some people think they have control over everything and get stuck because they can’t accept that they don’t. We make choices, yes, but think about it – do you really have control of anything? Nope.

Out of My Control

Mishaps are out of my control and sometimes they turn out to be blessings in disguise. Every now and then they are a direct result of something I did or didn’t do and I take responsibility for it. I’ve learned to roll with the good and the bad. And the ugly. I also learned to laugh at myself a long time ago because I do some funny stuff  (liiiiike, sitting at a light in my oh-so-clean whip, nodding my head like I am SO cool when my scarf is caught and hanging out of the door…caked with mud). If you see me laughing, know that I’m not crazy (something is just funny to me)… no comments please.

But yeah, when you change your perspective to be more optimistic, you realize:

  • One or two “off” things don’t have to define or ruin your day or your mood
  • It’s not just happening to you – people everywhere may be having the same kind of morning as you (Google narcissist – it ain’t all about you Sparky)
  • If you fall into a funk, you’re not giving yourself a chance to feel better

Keep on Rocking

Acceptance goes a long way to making sure small things don’t turn into big things. You probably know someone whose middle name is “Drama.” Everything is a major event and the world must stop and witness the drama that is disrupting their life. If something disturbs you deeply, or you’re going through bigger issues, it can be downright difficult to work through it quickly but I guarantee you this: the world will keep on moving whether you are grooving with it or not. Time does not stop. If you want to be sad, mad, grumpy, then do that, give yourself permission, just don’t take it out on the innocent- the kids, the spouse, the dog, the cashier at the supermarket – and don’t let it consume you if you can help it. I think we all get in our feelings at times, especially when life hurts you.

You may have heard this before but trials give you the opportunity to choose to be bitter or better. I choose better every time. Plus being bitter makes your hair gray. True story. Okay, not true – I totally made that up. I just read recently that a lack of copper in your diet can cause you to gray. But that’s off topic…

Originally Written: January 8, 2016

OneHipSista

Hi. I'm Valerie. Glad you're here – come on in and sit a spell. I've never put so much of my writing online but I share my personal experiences in hopes that I help someone in some way. I hope you find something you read thought-provoking, amusing or encouraging. Reach out or comment if you like. Please forgive the typos, grammar and cussing. Thanks for stopping by.

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